Why do kids interrupt? And how can you interrupt your child’s interruption habit? We’ve all been there! You’re having an ‘adult’ convo with someone and suddenly your kid interrupts. He(my son in my case) wants to talk about Pokemon orย Hello Carbot! And the reply is always “Don’t cut in while someone is speaking buddy.”
+++All the while I’m trying to remember what the hell I was talking about in my ‘adult’ convo…
So what now? You love your kids to bits, but damn it’d be nice to have a solid conversation with someone without your little one interfering, interrupting, or whatever you wanna call it. I call it ‘ THE CUT IN and cutting in.’
The Bad Habit of Kid Interruptions
As a dad, I want my son to grow into a confident, articulate, and effective communicator. But, it is common for him to struggle with cutting in conversations, which is interrupting others when they are speaking or talking over them without waiting for their turn. That’s an, almost, daily deal…especially when daddy’s driving…let’s not get into that one here…
Not only is this behavior rude and disrespectful, but it can also hinder his ability to build strong relationships and communicate effectively in the future. So, it is important for me to teach him how to avoid cutting in conversations, which can be achieved through practical tips and strategies.
Hey, I’m not perfect, and I’m still struggling with this topic. But it’s getting better as he gets older. He turns 6 today. I’ve been teaching him to say “excuse me Daddy, can I say something.” Or something of that nature…
First of all, set reasonable expectations in a polite way. School-aged children, even older children, have a difficult time holding their thoughts for more than a few minutes. Indicate to them as best as you can that you’ll be with them as soon as possible and then stay true to your word.
In this article, I’ll give some effective ways to help your kids learn to listen actively, wait their turn, and communicate effectively with others. Easier said than done! I know that…it might take a little time but you gotta start somewhere…and here is somewhere. Go!
Why teaching communication skills is important
Effective communication is a crucial life skill that can impact every aspect of our lives. Communicating effectively enables individuals to form strong relationships, resolve conflicts, and achieve their goals.
It is essential to start teaching your children communication skills from an early age, as it will help them develop into confident and effective communicators. By teaching your kids how to communicate effectively, you are providing them with the tools they need to succeed in life.
Understanding Your Child’s Interruptions
Children interrupt conversations for various reasons. Some may interrupt because they are excited, have a sense of urgency, or have something important to say. Others may interrupt because they don’t know how to wait their turn or listen actively.
It is essential to understand why your child interrupts conversations so that you can address the issue effectively. By understanding the underlying cause of your child’s behavior, you can help them develop better communication skills.
In our case, it’s often that my son is simply excited about something we’re about to embark on or do. Or, he likes to talk about Pokemon and Dinos and there’s no one else to speak with about these topics…so…Daddy!
I listen to everything he says. Most times he’ll have my full attention but he must jump in at the appropriate time before I give him the attention he wants.
++So what is the main reason that your little one is interrupting? Create a safe space for your child to speak and understand that a child’s attention span is not like ours. Find out your child’s needs and go on from there. You will end up creating a great bond and communication skills in the long run.
Teaching active listening skills
Active listening is an important part of effective communication. It involves paying attention to what the other person is saying, understanding their perspective, and responding appropriately. Teaching young children active listening skills can help them go a long way to becoming better communicators and build on their social skills as well.
You can teach active listening skills by encouraging your child to maintain eye contact, ask questions, and summarize what the other person has said. These skills will help your child understand the other person’s perspective and respond appropriately.
Teaching turn-taking skills
This is a tricky one asย my son is a lone child. No siblings! -And none coming, for those that are curious- Turn-taking is an essential skill for effective communication. The pattern of conversation like turn-taking involves waiting for your turn to speak and allowing others to express their ideas.
This takes a little bit of work with young kids, but with a little luck and love, good manners will sprout!
Teaching your children turn-taking skills can help them develop better communication skills. You can teach turn-taking skills by encouraging your child to wait for their turn to speak, taking turns in conversations, and acknowledging others’ ideas.
These skills will help your child communicate effectively and build strong relationships. Simply tell them to keep their ideas until you’re done speaking to Mom, or whoever you were speaking with. Tell them on a continuous basis…Never stop until they learn. Take a deep breath, be patient. It’ll work.
Creating a communication-friendly environment at home
Creating a communication-friendly environment at home can also help your child develop better skills, whatever your marital status is. You can create an environment where everyone can express their ideas and opinions freely without fear of judgment or ridicule.
Encourage your child to express their thoughts and feelings in the best ways possible and listen actively to what they have to say. By creating a communication-friendly environment at home, you are helping your child develop better communication skills and build strong relationships that will help in real life social interactions as adults.
We talk a lot at home, as we don’t use much screen time. So we play puzzles, Qwirkle and are super-active. This in return, gives us plentiful time to chit-chat about the day. It’s important not only for the child’s feelings but also as a gentle reminder to my son that this is normal behavior and that we are a team and we’re here to listen.
Common mistakes to avoid when teaching communication skills
When teaching communication skills, it is essential to avoid some common mistakes. One mistake parents make is interrupting their children when they are speaking. Interrupting your child sends the message that it is okay to interrupt others in conversations. It’s a big faux pas as kids mimic us as parents…
Another one is not giving your child enough time to express themselves. Rushing your child to express themselves can hinder their language skills and the ability to communicate effectively. My little one is juggling 3 languages, so he, at times, struggles to find his words.
Last Word on Children’s Interruptions
Needless to say, children learn what they live. Have you read my article about Monkey See Monkey Do?…
Your child is very unlikely to learn not to interrupt if they hear you, your spouse, or their siblings constantly interrupting each other. Your actions have a strong influence on your child. So the next time set a good example ask permission to speak before speaking, and apologize when you inadvertently cut in.
+More Tips!
No More Cut In! Develop some ideas for them to occupy themselves with while you’re on the phone or otherwise unavailable. Keep a box full of puzzles, children’s books, crayons, colorful markers, or other quiet toys nearby that they can only use when you have to make a call.
++Set snacks and drinks on an accessible level so they don’t have to cut in and ask you for help.
When you need to make a phone call or have an important adult conversation with a visitor, avoid trouble by saying you’re about to phone someone or have a conversation and estimate how long you expect to talk.
++Ask them if they need anything before you make your call or have important conversations with your company.
Enjoy your kids and all the ups and downs that come along with fathering… They are only young once! Have a good time!
Open-Ended Questions and Fun Strategies
- Open-Ended Questions: These are questions that encourage kids to think and express themselves (e.g., โWhat do you think happens next?โ). Use them to teach patience by asking during interruptions, and shifting their focus to problem-solving instead of cutting in.
- Simple Game: Play a โconversation waiting game.โ Have kids hold a small object while they wait for their turn to speakโit’s a fun way to practice self-control.
- Body Language Cues: Teach them non-verbal signals like a raised hand or tapping your arm gently for โurgentโ things.
- Role Play: Practice interrupting scenarios and demonstrate a โgood wayโ to wait.
- Good News: Praise their efforts when they succeed.
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